Whats the dumbest thing you have ever seen a player do during a game?

[BarstoolProphet]

So, it\'s a White Wolf game, and my Pack goes to the rescue of a young Get of Fenris girl who\'s about to undergo her first Change (an odd bit of precognition that we have not yet figured out).
We go up against a bunch of Fomori, and a Get of Fenris pack joins the fight against a Black Spiral Dancer pack and a spirit of freakish power... a Nexus Crawler.

Somehow, our side wins (still amused by my Willpower successes that made me the only one to not get turned into a Care Bear or a piece of furniture).

The fight over, introductions are made between my Pack and the survivors of the Get Pack. Turns out that their leader is one of the \'big ones\'. The feature character type in the book. I can\'t remember his name, right now, but he\'s at least Rank 4, and could probably have eaten our entire Pack without breaking a sweat, even after the big fight we\'d just had.

And one of my Pack members, who really ought to be named \'Speaks Without Thinking\' issues a Challenge to the guy. It took a lot of fancy talk, and browbeating my Packmate to get him to concede without getting himself all dead.

 

[Naukhel]

Not exactly a dumb thing, RP-wise, but still very funny, I thought.

I just started a new D&D 3.5 campaign on friday, and my players are putting on
different accents for their characters, which makes the roleplay more interesting.
Anyway, one player is very new to the group, and isn\'t used to these things.
He asked my wife, \"Are you saying that in character, or out of character?\"
My wife replied, \"If I\'m doing an accent, then I\'m in character.\"
He smiled at her, then. \"I don\'t want to sound offensive, but you already speak
with an accent. My ear may not be able to discern the difference between your
normal accent and your character.\"

She\'s from England, (South Hamptons) and was doing a Scotish accent for her
dwarven character.

 

[Ebonbuddha]

This is a great thread. Keep it going.

 

[LadyArgent]

Cast darkness over their party while they were in melee. No, I wasn't the one casting darkness...I was one of the unfortunates in melee.

 

[uberdark]

in a game of warhammer 40k, a guy was being adick at a grand tournament, he pulls out his wang and says, "now thats a dick!" he was ejected a short time after. lol

 

[Wyrmypops]

In Star Wars RPG (the good one by West End Games, not the D20 one). The party of rebel heroes were heroically performing thier heriocs, assaulting an Imperial base. They got up a turbo lift and see a patrol of Stormtroopers down the corridor. The PC Bounty Hunter is up first and with a heroic "skooosh" propels a grenade from his arm launcher. Unfortunately the dice kicked in and the shot went wide, the grenade hitting something and bouncing back into the lift. The party hastily leapt out. Only to find themselves on thhe floor, in the middle of a ring of Stormtroopers with blaster rifles levelled at them.

In early D&D when we were puerile teenagers... A warrior and a Paladin were dungon delving. They met a fair maiden who took a shine to the Paladin. They went off for some intimate relations. The warrior stood guard at the door to their boudoir. Turns out she was some kind of monster. The Paladin had removed his armour, then got paralysed. The warrior outside took the screams to be passionate rather than life threatening, but eventually barged in and decapitated the monster. The event made its way into history when the Paladin player got a bit arsey, demanding the warrior player do something about the paralysis. Instead the warrior declared he'd rape the Paladin himself and set to.

In Vampire: Masquerade. We had a player that was suspicious of anything that got mentioned. Like he had an over proportioned "Detect Plot Hook" skill, which meant things that'd be described that were not plot devices but merely scene setting things would be trampled somewhat. The Gm hatched a plan.
The PC saw a pigeon, it was looking at him too. The PC approached, noticing it was on water so must be a duck or something. It flaps a bit and propels itself downstream. The PC chases it, having to change into a wolf-form to keep up. The bird takes flight. The PC elects to do the same after adopting a bat-form. As he gains ground he sees the bird is larger than he thought. Finally the bird comes to rest and the PC can approach close anough to notice... it's a wild goose.

 

[Dragonsreach]

Not really a game or RPG instance directly but I have to share this one:-

Travelling on the bus to Gamesday '08 the "Adults" are having a discussion about RPG'ing and the characters we've ended up playing at one point or another.
One of our group, S******* is a lovely girl, but slightly naive in some respects, comes out with the classic line of:-
"Well I was playing a Halfling theif, who got cursed and ended up having to shag all this lot, twice over!"

Conversation kind of petered out after that.:eyeroll:

 

[Astorderire]

It was in "Heavy Metal", an old french rpg... We were playing Terminator-like robots enforcing a fachist state (did I mention it was a french rpg?)
We were supposed to save some hostages from some freedom fighters and were searching through a huge building.
After several Vaudevillesque ambushes, we were quite upset and jumpy, so when we detected heat sources under a bed in the next room, I decided that this time I would be on the giving end of the surprise whip...
So I crush the bed with the 500kg of my PC after a graceful jump, ruining the carpet around the bed with the splashed remains of the unfortunated terrorists in a very graphic yet post modern way...
Of course, they were not terrorists but the hostages... An hour later I was converted into familial-size baked beans cans...

 

[Yves]

Playing D&D our group just entered an old castle and was trapped in the hallway by dozens and dozens of enemies. Even worse, two of our party members fell into a hidden pit (no spikes or anything [thank god]). So what does our little elven ranger do?
"If I use my net as a rope, I can get them out of the pit to join the fight again!"
He said it, he did it and sure as hell he messed it up! After failing his check he slipped, fell ontop of the other two guys in the pit and covered them all with his magic ultra-heavy net.
Needless to say the rest of the group, my dwarf and and his stepson, were torn to shreds, fighting a futile fight for 25 minutes.

That same elf's response to an ogre charging at him was to close the door between him and the ogre... So our casting was interrupted and we also had to deal with big chunks of a bursting door hitting us before the fight had even started.

 

[jefcully]

I was a player with a sword that shot fireballs. We met a kind of underground magic garden, which I promptly fired. I do not know if there was a treasure in the garden, but I am sure I killed all the monsters.

 

[Sir Wulf]

In a game of Living Greyhawk, our party descended a shaft into a massive, water-filled cavern. Standing on a large island in the cavern's center, we found ourselves chatting with an undead aboleth in the water. It soon called forth undead allies in several different parts of the cavern.

A barbarian warrior and his fighter cohort had been traveling with my pompous wizard, my wife's elven priestess, and a low level wizard-rogue, so I urged them to stay close and hold off the undead horde while we blasted the foes with our magic and archery.

The fighter charged a group of undead 60 feet away. The barbarian charged the aboleth 70 feet away in the opposite direction. We didn't even get one buff spell off before they were gone. "Ummm... Guys!? Where are you going?"

The barbarian was dead in one round. The fighter dropped the round after that. Fortunately, the survivors were able to run faster than the undead could chase.

 

[wamphyri]

Was playing Blood Bowl with a friend and loosing quite bad. My frind started to rub it in and to show me how bad i was playing he lined up 3 of his players against another model that was on the edge close to my side of the board to put in a tackle and possible get the kill. i said notting letting him think i had lost all hope at this stage which i had i just wanted to see where this move was going. As if he went the other way he could pos get another touch down. In his next move he put in the tackle knocked him down did a dirthy tackle,passed the ref roll, ref did not see and killed the model. He jumped with joy did a little dance.......... and then i asked him why did he kill his own star player. You should have seen his face. i did loose the game but for years after it was better than winning.

 

[funnymouth]

i was playing battletech at a recent con, and attempted to punch a zeus (biggest mech in that game) with my stinger (smallest mech in that game). i missed, and he promptly kicked off my leg, then ignored me.
i heard people laughing about it for the next two days of the con.

 

[screamingabdab]

used to do plenty of RPG back in the day, and the highlight of stupidity & irritation has to be this classic from our Cyberpunk days.

One of the PC's secretly does extra roelplay with the DM in which he instigates a plan to have us (the other 3 PC's) captured & put in cryo-stasis whilst he goes off for a few years training to become a super ninja/soldier/bad-ass. After the training he brings us out of stasis and informs of us of his newly gained skills and how great an addition he now is the group. Needless to say we don't take kindly to it and proceed to organise a manhunt for him and end up trapping him in the public toilet of a shopping centre & detonating his treacherous arse with several pounds od high explosives.

 

[bensnewman]

During a shadowrun game we had a job that involved breaking into a window factory. Breaking in went fine unfortunately, once we were in nobody could remember what the job was (and the GM decided it was more fun to be a bastard and not remind us than have us continue the mission) so we ended up having a contest to see who could throw a security guard through the most windows... Ended up being one of the most memorable games we ever played

 

[Gannon]

I once had a player recklessly cut open a dragons stomach. The acid from the stomach splashed on his sword and armor and started eating through it. He quickly doffed the armor and ran through the rest of the campaign with only clothes. He was a little mad about that...

 

[Moradin]

I was DMing a AD&D game (2nd edition) where I had an evil halfling cavalier and his 'good' friend a necromancer. They went to see the master of the necromancer, a powerful necromancer (me as a DM) in his tower, to get objects identified. The halfling wanted to have a ring identified, the Master looked at it and then throw a spell on the halfling. The little guy found himself ouside the tower way above it! I described the falling down and you should have seen the player panicking as his character was falling to his death... only to stop a few mere inches from the ground and land safely (feather fall ring). I must say that it was quite memorable laugh as the guy was breathing so heavily and knew then that you do not ask for favor of high-level magician without having a price to pay! I have add in, once in a while, quite some dark humor in these games! (and as a DM I can do want I want:devil

 

[BigRedRobot]

I was playing a halfling sorcerer once and I find myself spider-climbed to the ceiling without any spells left for the day above a gelatinous cube. I don't have a ranged weapon, just my trusty spear. This thing is trying to kill my friends, so the only course of action was to of course release the spiderclimb and fall/charge the cube. Yeah, they had to fireball me out of there before I dissolved. Good times.

 

[Tercha]

Many years ago at a local gaming club I joined a 6 player game 3v3 ACW Me on the right flank with a couple of brigades of confederates, always wanting to adapt having never played tis set of rules i just cleared up a few points as to forced retreat off the map etc and the game began
everyone twiddled about with straightening their line and positioning artillery as their troops arrived on board, my troops dashed across the board and as the union troops were arriving fired then formed line as other columns arrived firing and charging (order mixed) needless to say for my opposite number was forced to retreat and having just entered left the board not to return, subsequently my troops did a left wheel and rolled up the union line much to the pleasure of the other players on my team who were barely set up upon entering their units
the Funny bit was a nerdy 40 yo (union centre) asking my opposite number banal questions on historical accuracy of the figures rather than offering any assistance as his nice neat lines of troops dissolved into panic and the union left flank disintegrated, I don't think the two of them ever played again on the same team, or in fact ever spoke again.

Edit: Oops...not really "role playing" my bad

 

[Hieronymus]

While playing Vampire, my character, who had been a college student, was driving the other characters back to our lair in a black SUV down Lake Shore drive in Chicago. I failed some kind of roll and we got pulled over by a cop. My guy was Brujah, totally anti-authoritarian. Next to him was a Gangrel who had been a marketing executive and in back was a Tremere who had worked for the District Attorney's office. The other character was another Gangrel who had been a scientist, I think. The cop comes up to the window and asks to see my license.

We were all pretty beat up from a fight we had with the Bad Guy's minions on lower Wacker Drive. I didn't want to push anything, so I reach for my wallet. The Tremere ex-lawyer tells the Game master that she's pretending that she's sick and has to get home. She starts making gagging and retching noises from the back seat. The Gangrel next to me is covered in blood and has long claws growing where his fingernails used to be. He failed a Humanity roll and was taking on wolf-characteristics. The other Gangrel character starts trying to explain why we're speeding. The cop is getting really suspicious as he sees what's going on. The lawyer vampire is still making sick noises... He tells me to get out of the car. We're all trying to shout over each other as the game master is shaking his head and laughing and rolling dice. I tell everybody to shut up, or I'll tear out their throats... Not the thing to say in front of a cop.

The cop is about to call for back up... that's when I use my Celerity to draw my Desert Eagle and shoot him through the heart. We made the news that night, (in game, anyway). Later the game master said he wasn't trying to teach us a lesson. He had just randomly rolled up a cop with a high willpower.

We were smart players and our characters were smart. When we played D&D, we were great together. But when we were vampires, for some reason, we came down with a collective case of the stupids.