Whats the dumbest thing you have ever seen a player do during a game?

[Onis Lair]

Good stuff good stuff. Here is one from me.

I was running a ravenloft game, enough said i know. Anyway i forget the domain but there is a little cajuin area ruled by a Zombie master who was known to ride through the town when it rained and would decapitat anyone he cought outside and reanimate them for his plantation. I had stressed this fact over a dozen times. So that night it rains and i mention to the group they could hear hoofbeats from outside. So what does a player do... instantly announces she sticks her head out the door and takes a peek. i ask to make sure she wants to do that, hopeing to give her a chance to say no. She doesn\'t, she repeats she sticks her head out the door to look. So... i cut off her head. Did i mention the player was my fiance. It wa snot ahappy week for me.

 

[Amazon warrior]

Some of these are brilliant! Brilliantly stupid, of course...

I\'ve got a few. One is hearsay, didn\'t see it myself, but since my bf was the DM...

The setting is Planescape and the party is in the sewers of Sigil fighting a huge octopus. Lots of sploshing around and high jinks. Then the sorceror, who happens to be as mad as a box of frogs, decides to cast chain lightning on it. In the water. With the rest of the party standing in it. D\'oh!

Another, that I was actually there for, also occurred while playing Planescape. The party consisted of my LG human bard D\'Kale (don\'t ask!), a NE feyn\'ri (Maraz) and a CN elf (Hotaza). My character was a green Prime, totally Clueless, the others were Planewalkers. Maraz was a Bleaker and Hotaza was a Revolutionary.

We were in a basement in Sigil, hunting for some stuff in an abandoned Revolutionary hideout, when the Harmonium guards above us heard and came to investigate. They attacked - they did have us bang to rights, after all - and D\'Kale went into full retreat and did his best to persude them that we meant no harm. Just as he succeeded, Hotaza came in and informed them that actually, we were there to nick stuff. And by the way, had they heard of the Revolutionary league? Of course, they promptly attacked! Never quite forgave him for that...

This resulted in us running down an underground passage, where we came across another Harmonium dude. What does Hotaza do on seeing him? He goes up and introduces himself, and asks him if he wants to join the Revolutionaries! At this point, D\'Kale and Maraz took out the nightsticks they happened to have, and proceeded to beat him over the head until he was unconcious. It was for his own good. Honest! Luckily, we had absolutely NO trouble getting the guard to believe he was insane... lol

That pretty much defined our behaviour to each other for the rest of the campaign. D\'Kale had improved grapple, just so he could grab Hotaza at crucial moments. It was an entire campaign of stupid! To be fair, we all did some bloody daft things.

 

[rosac]

a guy playing with shooty dark eldar ran straight at my black templars, he never shot his dark lances, and i just butchered his army

 

[Gilvan Blight]

Bragging repeatedly that their Jedi was tougher then Boba Fett in a Star Wars D20 game.

Resulted in a TPK in space over Coruscant.

Dumbest part is the player fumed that he meant he could take Boba Fett one on one, in hand to hand. This was quickly quashed as every player agreed that Mr. Fett got his reputation due to him purposely not being stupid enough to go mele with a Jedi.

 

[uberdark]

i once ran a game where these guys were not that smart who played. they were tracking a dragon and ended up in the bottom of a dank dark cave. at which time one of them sees that there is an eerie glowing fog at the bottom. this happens to be a green fog and has a noxious odor. smells a bit like hmm can we guess people? so he says \"i light a torch\" are you serious i say. then all the other characters start saying that they are running out and he insists on doing this. i say man i would really reccomend against this. he insists and realizes at the last moment its the methane from the dragons breath.

game ended with

your party manages to kill off the evil dragon... guts and gold are blown halfway across the kingdom and you collect a fair amount of loot. the part of the rod you were looking for is however destroyed and you are now minus one paladin.

needless to say Heiryonimus the paladin did not show up again. lollollollollol

 

[vincegamer]

I was playing chess once and my opponent forfeited. I couldn\'t figure out why until I realized he mistook his bishop for a pawn.

oh, wait, that\'s not a role playing mistake.

I have a fireball story, but it\'s not very interesting.
I was a player, with a sword that shot fireballs. We encountered some sort of underground magical garden, which I promptly set on fire. Don\'t know if there was any treasure in the garden, but I\'m pretty sure I killed all the monsters.

 

[Brimshack]

This was first edition D&D and the characters were arranged in a circle with fighters to the outside and spellcasters on the inside. They were fighting a mob of demons of various types and levels. The thing is there were enough characters to form a tight circcle, but they just weren\'t doing it. There was just enough space between each of the fighters in the outer ring that the demons were trickling through. I remember my frustration when the players set up the ring, just knowing they were going to get their butts kicked because they tried to control just a little too much ground. What could have been an easy fight was now potentially a TPK. I also remember a round or two into it, thinking the outer ring wouldn\'t last one more round; death was coming.

...and then the party leader yelled out for the fighters to bring it in a little. He then adjusted all his fighters backwards about 1\" each, making for a decent circle big enough to protect the casters and small enough to seal off the gaps. The next player did the same as did the next (we were running 2 segments at a time, staggered between the characters and the enemy. Saved, I thought, this would take care of it; it would be tricky but they might actually pull it off.

Until the last player stepped up. He proceeded to take all of his fighters and turn them around. They ran at full speed to the center of the circle and then turned around again. So, we now had a tight ring of fighters in the middle - standing behind the spell-casters - and another ring of fighters on the outside, the latter ring now looking like swiss cheese. And with the last player done, I now ran the enemy for 2 segments.

...TPK.
_________________

 

[Brimshack]

In my 1st edition campaign, the group had just defeated a major army of evil warriors and they were contemplating what to do. The god, Lei Kung, showed up and offered the group a deal; they should leave the army to return home in its crippled state. In return he would (switched to metagaming mode - each player could have one of his characters ask Lei Kung for one thing). So, when one player\'s turn came up, he hesitated for a moment, then said it couldn\'t hurt to ask. He had his Paladin ask Lei Kung for a Holy Avenger. So, there it was a Holy Warrior asking an evil deity for a holy sword, just a little off base I thought. Now the player had already been told in the previous game (when he asked a mage - actually a Vampire - for a Holy Avenger) that such items were between him and his own deity. So, I was about to say no, when a thought occured to me.

Lei Kung left, came back a minute later and handed the Paladin a sword with the stump of a bloody hand still gripping the handle. The player was elated, ...and somewhat surprised when it seemed to function as a simple +2 blade.

 

[NerdyOgre254]

Don\'t get me started... uh oh too late

I\'m one of those people who tries to spread the goodness of roleplaying to everyone. sometimes, however, it doesn\'t work.
1. The worst thing that player A has done is open her mouth. She can\'t work in a group. she attempts to dominate every conversation and turns everything that SHOULD be simple into a great bloody shouting match.
2. Player B is a power gamer :cussing:. so basically nuff said. i don\'t mind the occasional power tweak, but when the player starts asking for handouts, then it gets a little annoying.
3. Player C, when in a life or death situation, asks for a cookie. I MEAN WHAT THE HELL! and when i asked them what was up with it, he responded by:
\"well, if you hadn\'t had anything to eat for the last month or so, and you were going to die anyway, would you ask for a cookie and probably die but maybe get a cookie and hence survive, or simply answer the question and survive only to die from starvation.\"
That was about 3 weeks ago, and i am still angry about it.
4. Player C has no knowledge of the rules, and yet asks me why these rules are made the way they are regardless of situation.
Yeah, so you can see, i RP with dumb people.

 

[daddyo]

unthinking players

I have a fairly enthusiastic group of players. Sometimes they accidentally think about what they are up to.

Recently, a half-elven sorcerer/thief found some chainmail of levitation. Since around here, *Identify* only reveals one power, command word, or plus per cast for an item, he ID\'d the command word for \"up.\"
He then proceeded to don the armor and spoke the command word.

Which promptly launched him straight up at righteous speed. Sadly, he was inside the Wizard\'s Guild Library at the time, so he got to spend most of an hour trying to figure out how to get himself unpinned from the 40 foot high ceiling.

The rest of the Wizards in the library stood around and took bets on his predicament. The PC\'s god even got in on one of the pools going around. (guess who won that pool...)

The hapless PC was rescued when one of his partymates climbed a ladder and ID\'d the command word for \"down.\" After climbing back down the ladder, the partymate said the command word (under his breath), and our intrepid ceiling sticker came floating safely to earth. (btw, the command word has yet to be shared.)

I really enjoy role-playing opportunities!

 

[Gilvan Blight]

Thread resurection!

Totally forgot about this thread, but have something amusing to add.

I\'m running a 3.5 D&D game with a definately Dungeon Crawl, Hack and Slash feel. The players are working through Barrow of the Forgotten King having just finished The Howling Horde (both WotC modules). After falling into a few ambushes the party sits down before entering a masoleum and discusses strategy. After a fair bit of time the decree they are sick of having mobs jump them and want to turn the tables on the mobs and suprise them for a change. To this end their strategy for the first room is to have the half orc barbarian boot in the door and charge into the room screaming hopefully getting the drop on whoever was there.

Well here\'s how it went. The Barbarian boots in the door and sees a steep set of stairs going down, there is blood spilled on them. I give her a chance to reconsider before requiring a tumble check.... she decides to go for it, this is the new plan, this is where the party turns things around... /clatter/ 1. The Barbarian tumbles head over heels down the stairs and hits a landing. When falling you roll D2 to see how many squares you roll at the end, 2! right off the end of the landing. I give her another Tumble check to regain her balance.../clatter/ 1 again!, she rolls down the second set of stairs and lands 5 feet into the room right next to the corpse of one of the villagers the party was sent to find.

This put a quick end to the bash the door, run in screaming method of dungeon exploration.

 

[airhead]

Threadomancy....



Teaching a whole new batch of D&D players. One shoots a bunch of the crew off of a boat - in the not too clean harbor. After the combat, the player asks about looting the bodies - I point out that they are floating around the boat. Player gets ready to dive in to loot. I point out the fins circling around the bodies as I grab a few dice. \"Still want to dive in?\"
Player decides that the few cp\'s would not be worth it.

 

[SofaKingComfy]

Fall asleep around my friends.lol

 

[DrEvilmonki]

Me and my mates haven\'t role played in about 20 years and for some reason we all got interested again at the same time a couple of weeks ago.

We have just started playing the new 40K RPG and I rolled up a sanctioned psyker. One of my powers is Spasm and my mates had a bit of an odd sort of chuckleat that when I was telling them what my powers were.

Then in our first fight I decide to see how this shit works and announce I am going to try to make one of the enemy go into a spasm. This was met with One friend laughing and saying \"oh it makes OTHER PEOPLE spasm - I was wondering wtf the use of making yourself have a fit was\" To which my brother admits that he had thought exactly the same thing.

 

[generulpoleaxe]

funniest thing a mate ever said when roleplaying.

we were playing shadowrun and needed to find a certain person who we new was being looked after in a brothel.
said person was very young.

as we walk in an employee of the brothel aproached us and asked if we were looking for anything inparticular, my frien dreplied\"i\'m looking for a little girl!\"

lollollol i nearly wet myself

 

[Mosch]

D&D 4

Dwarven Cleric: \"Now all of ye be very careful, this ceiling be...\"
Fighter: \"Stand aside!\" *briskly strides towards glory*
Dwarven Cleric: \"...unstable and may cave in at the slightest tremble.\"
Fighter: \"You\'re just trying to\" *loud sounds, then silence*

And thus ends a cautionary tale which, like so many others, teaches us that sometimes \"glory\" is synonimous with \"thousands of tons of rocks dropped on your head\".

 

[generulpoleaxe]

Back when i was a teenager and my friends and myself used to play shadowrun, one of the players (my friend paul) said get a taxi, so i called one over and shot the driver.
theirs your taxi i said, paul replied, i meant call one so we can merly go to the meet you prat! lol

i still takes things a bit too litteral sometimes.

 

[Amazon warrior]

Originally posted by Mosch
D&D 4

Dwarven Cleric: \"Now all of ye be very careful, this ceiling be...\"
Fighter: \"Stand aside!\" *briskly strides towards glory*
Dwarven Cleric: \"...unstable and may cave in at the slightest tremble.\"
Fighter: \"You\'re just trying to\" *loud sounds, then silence*

And thus ends a cautionary tale which, like so many others, teaches us that sometimes \"glory\" is synonimous with \"thousands of tons of rocks dropped on your head\".

Heh. Rocks fall, everyone dies! lol

 

[porkchop806]

i was the player in this story lvl 5 chaotic nutral warrior our dm was all about gylps well i after a argument with the party i pissed on the power gylps in the center of the temple our dm tired of the bickering and atempted coups for party leader he made th damn thing go poof in a giant explosin wich defacto made us make new charter sheets was recived dirty looks for like a week and it dosnt help when you charater defect is add and the dm makes you take d20 roll every time you anger him

 

[BPI]

Roughly 4th level D&D3.5 party, just ransacked a minor ancient tomb. Combined years playing experience of party well over 100 years! I was the DM.

DM to the Ranger: so the sword, now that you wield it, is gently glowing with a holy blue light. You feel a gentle force draw you toward the north & have a definite sense of the presense of undead in that direction\".

Ranger: cool, a magic undead seeking sword.

DM to rest of party: The Ranger is swinging a rusted lump of steel about, crowing about his magic sword, he looks a bit of a plonker.

Party: It could be cursed? Might just be appearance, looks rusted until you hold it, then reveals its true properties?

Ranger: What are you wittering about, it\'s a Holy Avenger, are you blind?

Distracted Sorcerer: why not hit something with it, pull the blow a bit but see if it cuts like a blade or hits like a rusty rod?

Ranger: Okay (takes huge swing at his brother the Sorcerer who falls unconscious & on -4hp has only a few seconds to live)

Ranger to DM: Is he cut or bludgeoned?

Rest of party: jaws dropped, speechless.

Moral, don\'t let players move onto the 3rd bottle of cider until after 10pm!

Tickled me! B.