You have a decent colour scheme going on, and black undercoat can hide a multitude of sins, but your brushwork is far too haphazard and messy; it looks like you painted with a roller! Some areas are not fully painted, other bits have massive overspill. Try and stay within the confines of each section you are painting. You might want to start with a basic colour scheme, then use a nice neutral all-over wash (like Vallejo Smoke) and finish by highlighting carefully along edges and raised areas with your original base colour
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