Ho Ho Ho! Let\'s kill them all!!!!!

[barkel]

TW_JaM recently reviewed one of my dwarfs, which I welcome you all to do, I don\'t mind, really. Anyway, my dwarf army color scheme is creme and red with the occasional touch of green. TW_JaM said the colors were nice, but I should be careful lest my army look like Santa\'s Helpers. So it got me to thinkin...

Has anyone ever done an army with a Santa motif? I\'m thinking primarily of Warhammer, because it\'s what I play, but any game with dwarfs or elves could work. And not that I mention it, would you use dwarfs or elves? All the chrismtas rhymes call Santa an elf, but he\'s far to fat to be an elf. He looks like a dwarf, but he\'s much to tall? Could it be that some poor stuntie successfully wooed a hot elf maiden onto the matress for a minute or two? Or, was it an ugly elf maiden?

Anyway, I think a Santa army would be very cool. Afterall, the President has a security retinue, shouldn\'t father Christmas? Rather than a chariot you could field a reindeer drawn sleigh and call it \"the Slay.\" You could have a catapult that launches presents filled with heavy objects. And Santa could have a special ability call the Regift. If any mage or special character successfully wounds Santa he can roll to send the wound back the giver.

So, what do you think, should Santa\'s armies be dwarfs or elves?

barkel

 

[Sand Rat]

Go with the squats, not the lean and lanky ones. I\'ve never seen a Santa themed army, but I did play Battletech with a guy who had converted an Atlas to the Atlas Clause, complete with red hat and pom-pom

 

[finn17]

This has been toyed with by some manufacturers

Quite a few companies have released Santa specials, including Citadel, GW, Assassin, and Alternative Armies. I know this because I have these Santa\'s in my collection. There are also a few conversions that individuals have attempted. I have seen at least one on CMON.

I don\'t think any manufacturer has ever done more than just a \'one off\' however.
I would imagine given the number of sick minds out there that there must be a couple of Santa armies around.

By the way, did you hear about the dyslexic black magician who sold his soul to Santa?

 

[frenchkid]

hummm well I never heard that santa was an elf, where are is pointy ears ? Anyway I would make them dwarf, don\'t all christmas stories picture santas helpers has dwarfs ? Well anyway that is definetly a cool army idea. Don\'t forget to post pictures
Hummm I just remebered that once I almost converted a goblin regiment to be litle santa helpers, with the whole santa outfit: hat coat, and the most important the bag with toys

 

[barkel]

on display

Hey, if I have a Christmas Themed army perhaps my wife will let me keep it on display during the holiday season. That way my army can be upstairs for people to see, even if I can\'t.

barkel

ps. It\'s lonely and dark down here.

 

[barkel]

goblins

My second favorite army! That would be funny. When you see half of the gifts I got as a child you might begin to believe Santa had some goblins on staff.

The idea of Santa being an elf comes from the poem, which really inspired the American Santa craze; \'Twas The Night Before Christmas.

The quote depicts a character you would think was a dwarf, but then turns around and calls him and elf:

His eyes -- how they twinkled -- his dimples how merry!
His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry!
His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow,
And the beard of his chin was as white as the snow.
The stump of a pipe he held tight in his teeth,
And the smoke it encircled his head like a wreath.
He had a broad face and a little round belly
That shook, when he laughed, like a bowl full of jelly.
He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old elf,
And I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself.

On top of that, many Christmas movies show elves as child like and small. The Santa Clause is a recent one.

barkel

 

[Sand Rat]

Originally posted by finn17
Quite a few companies have released Santa specials, including Citadel, GW, Assassin, and Alternative Armies.
Le snip

Reaper has at least two, if not three versions of Sophie available as Santa - including one where she is coming down the chimney - that could be interesting in your army as well - Mrs Clawslol

 

[Big Mean Elf]

Them is fight`n words!

Originally posted by barkel
So it got me to thinkin...

Has anyone ever done an army with a Santa motif?

All the chrismtas rhymes call Santa an elf, but he\'s far to fat to be an elf. He looks like a dwarf, but he\'s much to tall? Could it be that some poor stuntie successfully wooed a hot elf maiden onto the matress for a minute or two? Or, was it an ugly elf maiden?

So, what do you think, should Santa\'s armies be dwarfs or elves?

barkel

Ain`t NO \"UGLY\" Elf anywhere!

:]:flame:

Peace!
(Cept Barkel Today!)
:]lol

 

[barkel]

to Big Mean Elf

You said there is no such thing as an ugly elf. Well, perhaps that is true, by birth, but anyone can be horse-kicked.

And surely all elves are not equally pretty? I mean, there has to be one lady elf that none of the boy elves will touch with 10 foot pole. True, she might be quite fetching by human standards, but no amount of begging will get an elf man in bed with her.

She probably was ostracized from elfish society for being to hard to look at and so she went to live in the hills. While she was there, a young, almost handsome dwarf came wandering by. His axe was getting a little heavy... She was feeling a little empty... wines were exchanged and Santa Clause was created!

Naturally, he was ostracized by both elf and dwarf society, so he headed north to the frozen wastes to get revenge on both elves and dwarfs by being a benefactor to the humans. It all makes sense now!!!!

barkel

ps. I\'m sorry, but if nobody yells shut up, I won\'t. And even then it\'s hard to tell...lol

 

[Tuubje]

no no please, I\'m enjoying this, go on

 

[vincegamer]

Originally posted by barkel
The idea of Santa being an elf comes from the poem, which really inspired the American Santa craze; \'Twas The Night Before Christmas.

The poem by Clement Moore is actually titled
\"A Visit From Saint Nick\"

Strange then that the man who was once bishop Nicholas is called an elf but I think the poet was playing liberally with the term. He is a benevolent magical character. Dwarves in the culture of the poet are never benevolent. And Nick isn\'t short either.

Anyone else noticed not only \"santa\" \"satan\" but both are called \"nick\".

 

[vincegamer]

One more thing, on UGLY elves:

Ever read ElfQuest?
There is a half-elf half-troll character.

 

[Sand Rat]

Originally posted by vincegamer
Anyone else noticed not only \"santa\" \"satan\" but both are called \"nick\".

Well, then there is the Effinger short story \"Satan Claus\"

 

[tooshy]

Awwww.....

I always wanted to do a diaorama based on \"T\'was the night before christmas, and not a creature was stirring.....\" and have bed with about 4 goblins or snotlings fast asleep, with little stockings on the end of the bed. Too cutsie for words huh?

I also wanted to do a Christmas Day - present opening type thing - with an Ork surrounded by a boxes & wrapping paper etc holding a huge and I mean huge weapon, with the title \"Just what I always wanted..!\"

 

[Tuubje]

Originally posted by tooshy
I always wanted to do a diaorama based on \"T\'was the night before christmas, and not a creature was stirring.....\" and have bed with about 4 goblins or snotlings fast asleep, with little stockings on the end of the bed. Too cutsie for words huh?

I also wanted to do a Christmas Day - present opening type thing - with an Ork surrounded by a boxes & wrapping paper etc holding a huge and I mean huge weapon, with the title \"Just what I always wanted..!\"

I say make \'em, sounds great!

Oh and the guy being called Nicholas, here in the benelux we have 2 \"santa\'s\" .
One around the start of september, a kardinal named St. Niklaas. And the Santa himself near Christmas. A hell for parents as they give their lovely children 2 a year a bundle of toys. (the first one is only for the kids, actually very unethical person)

 

[Big Mean Elf]

Lawd Have Mercy...

Me get`n hot now...member me is BIG and Mean!

:flame::]

:innocent:

First off...dummy human,we Elves can magic up and fix a horse kicked nose ect...



And as for half elf this and half elf that...them AIN`T Elf no more!

And...I ain`t never met a Elfin Gal I would not put the ole \"Razz -ma- Tazz\" on her round cute lil azz!



Peace!
lol

 

[Nelson]

Yeah, use dwarves. They\'re my army, and personally, they would make waaayyy better helpers. There\'s even a thunderer model with a flopy hat and pom-pom.

I mail-ordered something in may or so, and I got a troll magazine. It featured dogs of war, and htere was this Midas The Mean model with a nice fat man. You could convert him fairly easily into santa. If yer going for a dwarfie santa, there\'s tons of models. You could use slayers as crazed helpers that have been laid off, and the flame cannon to turn baddies into lumps of coal.

 

[Nomis]

Dwarf? Elf?

Naah! make him an ogre!

 

[dauber22]

I was thinking more of \"The Butcher of Khardov\" as Santa.

And why are we assuming it was a male dwarf and an ughly elf maid? Maybe it was a drunk & horny elf (perhaps a dark elf) and some lonely dwarf woman. Of course, I defer to BME in all such matters.

@Tooshy - I love your second diorama idea! The ork opening his presents. AAwaiting seeing this piece

 

[U4-Welcome]

You could do a \"Christmas turned bad\" with a succubus (Sophie, we love you !) for Santa Lady, The Butcher for the One Santa, and Mid-Nor dwarves for twisted, cruel, aides, with sharp blades, bright colors, little GS\'ed present boxes here and there, and let\'s not forget the bonnet with a fluffy ball at the end !
Or maybe a heavily converted Space Marine - I\'d love to see Santa 40k with a boltgun lol !